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Thursday, September 24, 2009

Spreading Awareness of Biracial Kids

The night before the Huggies Live Auction for KaBoom event I attended a dinner for all the parents invited to the event. When I arrived to meet the group I was a bit surprised to be the only minority mom with a biracial child. As I met the parents I realized none of them would know who I was. These were a different set of blogging parents then the usual group I see at events.

At dinner I tried to form an open dialogue to get to know the parents and their blogs and hopefully share about my blog. Hmm. Didn’t quite go the way I hoped. But one parent was brave enough to tackle the unknown that I seemed to represent. LOL.

Bill (PoopandBoogies) was very curious about what I represented and what the goal of my blog is. We soon started a very intense and revealing discussion and an odd thing happened. Bill revealed that he felt like he was intruding by reading my blog…that my blog was off limits to "white" readers. This is not the first time I heard a white person express this feeling,

The ironic thing is that one of my goals in blogging is to include the "white" community, to spread awareness to them so they can see the world is full of many different diverse communities. I’m trying to be inclusive and bring them into the racial conversation as a supporting factor not the main ideal society has placed upon them.

Sometimes I find white people think their way and their lifestyle is the only one and their shell shocked when they encounter something contrary to their belief. Poor Bill expressed a thought very close to this. I have to give him credit for being honest with me about his feeling. Hopefully meeting me and Daniel has helped expand his awareness.

So the next day, as you know Daniel and I met Angie Harmom. There’s a funny side story here. Before Angie arrived I took the time to visit the ladies room to pretty up for any photos. By the time I got back to the group Angie and crew had arrived and was cooing over Daniel and another baby. The mom I asked to watch Daniel suddenly spoke up and said…he’s not my baby. I chuckled at that because the mom was white and it was a natural mistake that they would assume he was with her…and not the black women walking towards them. LOL

We then sat down with Angie and each took turns sharing a little about ourselves and our blogs. When my turn came I was a bit nervous since unlike the other parents I was the only minority mom with a biracial child. But I took a deep breathe and proudly explained that my blog is about raising awareness about moms of biracial children and the asian and black community.

I expected our meet and greet to end there but Angie actually asked me some questions and a dialogue was started. I was so impressed that she was interested enough to explore what kind of reactions do I get as a mom of a biracial and how I deal with things.

Another chance to spread awareness came during the event when I saw a white mom with her half black biracial kids. She had a son close to Daniels age and since they we’re playing in the same area we started chatting. I asked her if there was any mom of biracial play groups in the area. She said so far she’s only met another mom of biracial.

Seems most play groups are monoracial moms and kids. We both expressed frustration with having to deal with strange looks and the famous “Is that your baby” question. I told her we should meet and start one. So we exchange numbers and will plan a playdate.

Spreading awareness of blasian biracial children and the Asian Black communities isn't easy sometimes but when I have moments like was very encouraging.


Nicole says:
at: September 28, 2009 at 10:17 AM said...

Wow! I am so proud of you! Great post! My son's father [who is also bi-racial] said his mother would get stares when she would walk with my ex-husband down the streets is Holland. I think some folks are really curious, and just don't know how to approach the situation. Wonderful post by the way!

at: September 30, 2009 at 3:19 PM said...

I enjoyed our conversation. I was not shell shocked nor do I feel my lifestyle or way is the only way and I do not know how I feel about being portrayed that way.

My surprise or real questions were regarding that there was a Black Asian Bi-racial community. I did not know that there was a need for awareness for this type of community. After our conversation I understood what your objective was and I appreciated the honest dialog. I am now more aware.

In defense of the other bloggers that dinner did not lend it self to the type of conversation you were seeking.

The "intrusion" that I was speaking of when reading your blog is that it is not the typical mom blog.

Like I said, I enjoyed our conversation and I had a pleasant time making yours and Daniel's aquaintence.

Nikki @ Blasian Baby says:
at: October 1, 2009 at 11:28 AM said...

Nicole, Thanks :)

Bill, While I don't think I portrayed you or our conversation any way different then it went...your welcome to correct me on anything.

But your not welcome to speak for the others...LOL...seriously you were not there when I spent time with the other parents so you can't really defend them about their lack of interest in me or my community.

Also, just because you do not know...or think...there is a lack doesn't not mean there isn't. That's exactly my point. There's so many things people are not aware of...

But I think I now have to ask I can gain awarness...what is a typical mom blog? and why would you think my blog isn't one?

Yakini says:
at: October 1, 2009 at 8:47 PM said...

Good for you Nikki! As always, you've done a wonderful job of spreading awareness/educating folks about raising a blasian child as a black woman, and in a really gracious way too.

I'm curious about the typical mommy blog comment too. :-) Not offended, just curious. I wonder if I have one (lol).

Milk and Honey Mommy says:
at: October 10, 2009 at 3:02 AM said...

Nikki, wow! (I had to say it too). That was such a great opportunity to be able to share w/others like that. The blogging world can be, sometimes, still as polarized as the REAL world. It's amazing how many people shy away from a blog because of the race of the blogger. That may not be the real issue here, but when you start mixing in the biracial aspect, it can get a little tricky; it's not just black and white (black and Asian, etc). If people would take the opportunity to read a little further, they might find that there are more similarities than they thought.

I consider myself a typical mommy blogger (except I don't do many reviews or giveaways). I blog about my children who just happen to be biracial. There is no militant behavior going on, so don’t be afraid to read on.

William has left us all hanging and wondering w/deep curiosity as to the definition of a "typical mommy blog."

at: October 20, 2009 at 1:40 AM said...

Regarding setting up biracial playdates, I wonder what your opinion would be on this other blog post I read recently: