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Monday, August 17, 2009

The Grandparent Connection

About a week ago my stepfather ended up in the hospital after a heart attack. He had to have emergency surgery and all that. My family of course went into what I thought of as the "death fear" mode. It was interesting to see and hear people's reaction to the "fact" that we're all impermanent. But I won't get into that here....that's a whole other blog

Well my step dad survived the heart attack and surgery. I confess that I did worry that he might died without seeing Daniel face to face in real life. So far he's only seen him in photos.

But then I wondered why that was an issue since Daniel's fathers side never saw daniel....matter of fact I don't think they even know he exists. For my part my family on both side know and welcome Daniel. He's black west indian heritage is there for him to learn. Yet he's not just black is he? He's still missing the link to his korean side.

This of course was not the plan. I tried for months to get the formal intro to Pete's family way before we planned on having kids. Never happened. So many excuses. A the time I figured it would happen and it was no big deal. Then the two pink lines changed that thought. Now it became such an issue that I swore I would contact his mom during my pregnancy since his dad had already passed away. But then I felt a bit odd just showing up out of no where with my bump claiming it was her son's.

So I decided to wait till my son was born to claim kinship. But after the birth I was so busy settling into being "mommy" that I couldn't deal with the stress of meeting her. Now a year later faced with losing one side of the grandparent network I wonder if its time to finally make that visit before it's to late. I still don't know...